10 Tips On How to Better Understand the Opposite Sex

Hey y’all! I am back with yet another collaboration with the awesome Elisha from his blog: https://elishamcfarland.com . Definitely make sure to check it out; it’s pretty great.

All right, let’s delve into this topic!

10 Tips on Getting to Know the Opposite Gender

First of all, we’re going to discuss ten ways to better get to know the opposite gender (because, come on; you shouldn’t date someone until you know them at least a little…).

Here’s the girls’ side, from my view:


To better get to know a girl…

  1. Be friendly. Make casual conversation, and don’t constantly flirt. You don’t want to be labeled as a guy who is always flirting with girls, so just make conversation and see where it leads. Also, let her talk about herself. Everyone loves to talk about the things they love.
  2. Be outgoing; not shy. I know quite a lot of young people who want to get to know the opposite gender, but who are too intimidated to. Listen; girls are just as intimidated by guys, as guys can be, of girls. If you act like your normal self and are easy to talk to, you won’t have to worry about those awful conversations, where both of you are standing there, staring in awkward silence.
  3. Be watchful. If you are interested in getting to know a specific girl, then watch how she interacts with the people around her. See how she acts around her friends, and see how she acts around her parents and siblings. How she treats her dad is how she will eventually end up treating you; if she has respect for her dad, she will have respect for you. If she does not respect her dad; beware – she will have a harder time respecting you, later on.
  4. Communicate. If you are really interested in pursuing a specific girl, then communicate with her. Some people text, but my personal favorite, is writing letters. Seriously, if you want to get to know random girls, casually ask to write letters to them. Okay, it might be kind of weird, but it opens up the door to ask so many random questions, and writing letters is a wonderful way to get to know the opposite gender.
  5. Hang out. This goes hand-in-hand with conversing with girls. Just hanging out with the opposite gender can help you learn so much about them. I’ve figured out on my own, hanging out and conversing with guys, what type of guy I want to end up with. So, hanging out with the opposite gender and interacting is a huge part of getting to know them better.

All right! Here is Elisha for all you girls, with a guy’s view.

1: Don’t be shy. To many of us, shyness is a mark of attraction. I have made the mistake of believing that a girl acting shy around me was attracted to me, but instead, it turned out that she was extremely introverted. Don’t be afraid to talk to us or look us in the eye; we don’t bite.

2: Don’t be touchy/feely. If a girl touches my arm or something similar, I am immediately alerted to the possibility of an attraction. If you want to become our friends, but avoid the possibility of a romantic relationship, try to avoid touching us when possible. This also helps prevent many awkward situations.

3: Don’t be afraid to do things with us. A girl that isn’t afraid to attempt boy activities is a girl I’d like to make friends with. Even doing something simple like playing a video game with us is huge, and you will win the friendships of many guys by doing so.

4: Don’t flirt. That’s fairly self-explanatory. Don’t worry about whether you come across as flirtatious. Instead, make sure you aren’t intentionally flirting, and you’ll be fine.

5: Use the right terms. Terms are everything. In the past, I have worried about the possibility that a close friend of mine, a girl, was attracted to me. Thankfully, she fixed that problem with a single word: bro. She called me her bro, and I instantly knew there was nothing there. If you want to convey your platonic friendship with a guy, (or friendzone someone) call him your “bro”. This should be an instant giveaway as to your real intentions- friendship. 

10 Tips On Becoming More Attractive To the Opposite Gender

All right, now we’re going to look at ten ways to help the other gender find you more attractive. I’m here for guys, with the girl’s point of view.

  1. Be friendly, talkative and attentive. Girls like it when they can freely speak their mind to a guy, and know that he’ll listen to what they say.
  2. Keep Personal Hygiene. No offense guys, but girls really don’t like hanging out with guys who smell really sweaty and dirty. Even if you put a dash of cologne on, most girls will find that very attractive (don’t ask why; we just tend to like guys smelling good…).
  3. Be chivalrous. Most girls love it when guys are chivalrous. Even just holding the door open or pulling a chair out for a girl can go a long way.
  4. Constant Eye Contact. This might seem like a weird one, but it really is attractive to girls. Just randomly looking at a girl every now and then, will make her feel like you’re paying her special attention.
  5. Be kind and nice. Okay, this might seem like a given, but I think it needs to be on this list. Girls love it when they see that a guy cares, and is kind to those around him. Now, I’m not saying that you should just decide to be kind and nice because you want a girl to like you. That’s a horrible reason. You should be kind and nice, anyways, all the time. But I will say, girls do seem to be more attracted to a good, kind guy, than a rough, mean one.

Now, here is Elisha with a guy’s perspective, for all you girls…

Note: Attractiveness is, to guys, a personal definition, so it is difficult to lay down tips when these may not apply to all guys. However, for the sake of the general female population, I shall endeavor to cover as many aspects of guy attraction as possible.

1: Be yourself. If we, the guys, see you acting around us in a completely different manner as you would act around your close girlfriends, we may think you’re attempting to put on a different “face” around us. We are attracted to girls that act themselves around us.

2: Don’t be intimidated by us. There is absolutely no reason to be intimidated by guys, no matter our height/size. Acting intimidated will merely annoy the dudes around you.

3: Smile. An honest smile is, by far, the most attractive thing to me personally, and I know many who would agree. As a general rule, don’t be afraid to smile.

4: Dress to be attractive, not to attract. We can usually tell the difference here, and for the Christian guys, the latter is a huge turnoff.

5: Talk. Regardless of whether you’re extroverted or introverted, you shouldn’t be afraid to talk to us. Speaking your mind and engaging in conversation tells us that you’re smart and are perfectly capable of using your head, something that is sadly rare in today’s world. Talk to us.

I’m also going to add this here, which a great follower of mine, Timoth, pointed out. I think this works for either gender.

So, spending too much time on a electronic device is not only not attractive, but also not good for keeping and building friendships. There is a time for using technology for communication, but there is also a time to put it aside and focus on other things. Hard work is also attractive and shows how the person will be later in life, with a job or working around the house.

All right! I hope this post was informative to y’all. It was great to write with Elisha. You did a fantastic job, dude!! Make sure to check his awesome blog out (here’s the link again…) : https://elishamcfarland.com

Thanks for reading!! Have an amazing day, y’all!

26 thoughts on “10 Tips On How to Better Understand the Opposite Sex”

  1. Thank you for this. It was very helpful! Also for both genders, they didn’t include these, but watching how someone works and how much time they spend on their phone/computer when nothing else needs to be done to is a big tell of character and how they will act in a marriage. What do you guys think?
    What else would you guys have included if you had had the space/ time?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Always be yourself!
    Never try to change him. If he doesnโ€™t change on his own, heโ€™s no good for you.
    Be true to you!

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Iโ€™ve yet to see your weirdness lol! Iโ€™m ahead by leaps and bounds… just stay awesome ๐Ÿ‘

        Liked by 2 people

  3. This is a great post! I enjoy the points that you both made. So true. Talking with the opposite gender does not have to be weird, awkward, and uncomfortable. I think that if you stay true to yourself and embrace who God created you to be, it makes everything happen more naturally. I am one who is naturally introverted when meeting new people (guys & girls), but if I see that they enjoy talking and are extroverted, then it makes it easier for me to bring out my extroverted side. ๐Ÿ˜€ It doesn’t have to be odd. Just be yourself!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Loved this Keziah (and Elisha!)
    I’ve been friends with a guy for about 3 years now (it’s a really funny long story) and surprisingly he became a really good friend! We probably won’t date, but those are really good tips for just even being friends with a guy!

    Liked by 1 person

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